2 Sleeps; the Anxiety has taken over!

I suffer from anxiety as do a lot of people that we interact with on a daily basis.

One of my anxiety inducing moments is being in a hospital. It is 100% not rational and doesn’t make sense but here we are. Whenever I find myself as a patient in a hospital it doesn’t take long before I start to get antsy and beg my husband to take me home (spoiler alert: he never does), this is soon followed by panic attacks.

What is it about hospitals?

For me, hospitals are so hard because with the monitors and IVs and everything you are not able to just get up and leave if you want (heck, you can’t even go to the bathroom without clearing it with someone). This perceived inability to leave translates into a perceived situation where I am being held “hostage” and it brings back not-so-fond memories of being held against my will.

The reason I say perceived is that truthfully if I didn’t want to be in the hospital anymore I know that the staff aren’t going to keep me there; and if I can’t find any staff to help I can simply turn off the monitors and remove my IV. The intellectual side of my brain understand this…..the emotional side is ready to run headfirst into the walls screaming.

As I approach my surgery date my anxiety climbs as I contemplate all the things that can go wrong (up to and including just plain saying the wrong thing). One of the ways that my anxiety will be managed is with the use of a medication called Ativan which will be given to me at the hospital before the surgery. The other coping mechanism I use (this is the important one) is that my husband will be with me throughout my time before and after the surgery…. he is my emotional support human!

Anxiety is truly horrible in that even if someone recognizes that they have anxiety and what their triggers are they most likely still can’t control how they are feeling. There are many different forms of anxiety that stem from many different sources. If you or someone you know has anxiety make sure to figure what is calming as it can help during attacks.

For me having physical contact with someone I truly trust can act as a calming anchor when I’m struggling. Besides my husband I have a couple friends that have been known to take on this role as needed.

So although I’m very anxious about everything to do with Monday I know I’ll have both my husband as well as some medication to assist.

What is something that has helped you in moments of anxiety?


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